Three Months of Forever

Our first glimpse....

Three months ago, we stepped off of a plane, as a new family of six, into the loving hands of our family and friends. The past three months have been an amazing journey as our family has navigated into uncharted territory - juggling sports, school, surgery, dental/dr. appts., remembering to carry diapers/wipes (again!) and just seeing how things operate with four little guys versus our comfortable three.

As time goes on, and the new norm is formed, I remind myself that I do not want to forget. I don't want to forget the look on the foster family's face as they walked into the room with Maddox - their smiles, their happy chatter, their obvious excitement for their girl. I don't want to forget the look on so many of the faces of Guizhou - the look of hardness. For this, will be easy to forget. My Guizhou girl is one who smiles, one who laughs, one who cuddles, one who knows love. I don't want to forget the children in the orphanage - their cuteness, their smiles as we gave them candy, their yearning to share their precious pieces of artwork. I don't want to forget the sounds - the flow of their language, the music. I don't want to forget the craziness of their transportation - the high-packed, umbrella toting mopeds; the wild taxi rides; the smoke filled buses bouncing on unpaved streets. I just don't want to forget.....

And, as time goes by, I find myself trying to remember what our first days with Maddox were like. She interacted so well with us while her familiar foster family was around to comfort her. The moment they left the room, a cloud of panic took over her and she wailed, loud. However, she did not fight to get away. She just sobbed. And BIG tears flooded her little face. Nothing soothed her. She laid back on my lap and cried, holding her close was not an option, she was guarded in her grief. Later, at the hotel, we took off her layers of clothing to see firsthand just how little and fragile she was. Tiny. She ate a few bites of pizza. We saw a glimpse of a smile during her bath. Off to bed she went, no tears. The next morning, everyone awoke and we anxiously awaited together for her to wake up. Another "never forget moment" was when I went in to check on her....there she laid quietly, eyes wide open, looking around in the dark. When she spotted me, she adjusted her eyes and had a look on her face as if to say, "Oh, you are still here." There was no joy, all disappointment. She carried around a Barbie doll of MK's for the first few days. She had fun exploring our room and our bathroom. She was curious, about us, about everything. She began to cling to us, not because she wanted to but because we were all she knew - everything familiar had been taken from her.

And today, three months later.....Maddox is comfortable. She knows her routine and follows it well. She has gained three whole pounds, for this we are excited. She is eating more and willing to try whatever we are eating. She is the loudest of our four children, on this we all agree! She is a jealous soul. She will pose for pictures when she wants to and ignore the camera when she wants to. She is extremely flexible. She can say, "uh oh," "night night," "mama," and "oh yeah." She has stayed in the church nursery twice and cried both times, pitiful. She loves to be outside even when it is one hundred degrees. She loves the water. She likes to play with MK on her own terms. She is ticklish all over and has the cutest little belly laugh. She will give hugs and blow kisses. She loves babies, real or dolls. She is our doll - so sweet, so loving and we can't remember a day without her!

Home three months.....