As most siblings do, my boys have moments of arguing, not often but it does occur. Sigh. Being that they are boys and boys tend to be more physical versus mouthy, a usual hit or push can take place if their arguing escalates. And when that does occur, I inevitably intervene. After all is said and done and the mishap has been taken care of, I will sit with the offenders and ask them how that particular situation could have been avoided. I want their answer to be something to the effect of they should have used their mouths not their hands to solve the issue, I want them to come up with a verbal plan to solve their disagreements. I preach this to them, communication, even when they are having a verbal argument, I will have them sit together to devise a plan on how they can work their troubles out and they are not allowed to get up until the plan is presented to me and I agree with it....and I don't help them figure it out, it has to be their own plan. They are taught to use their words. Well, yesterday we had an interesting day. I have noticed that on the days that we choose not to do school, our schedule is wide open, routine is not in order, that is when the arguing most likely is to take place. So, for what I felt like was all day, I had two children who were just not choosing to get along and, quite honestly, it was making me a little weary. Nobody likes arguing. For weeks, Ryan and I have been planning a baseball celebration for the two of them. We had gotten them a gift, planned a special dinner, picked out a baseball movie to watch together, yummy dessert, it was supposed to be a lot of fun. Well, gift opened, children play for what seemed like one moment and then the last straw broke. They were sent to their room, told to sit on their beds, told that the party was cancelled, tears were shed, complete and utter disappointment was felt by all but for different reasons of course. Well, Ryan and I talked, decided that taking the party from them was a bummer so he suggested we have them come up with a reason that it should continue, they had to tell us why, after all of the fussing that had occurred in one day, why should we allow their party to continue. One brother said that he didn't even think they deserved to carry on with our plans, they had been fussy all day and their behavior, he knew, was unacceptable. The other brother wailed. We told them to keep thinking. A few minutes went by, Ryan and I are downstairs waiting. The boys appear. The spokesperson of the two says they have a reason that the party must go on......"Well, mom, you always say that we should use our words and that using our hands will get us into trouble. Today, as you will take note of, today, we used our words a lot. We did argue but we never hit or pushed or pinched....we used our words and that is why we think our party should go on." HMMMM.
