Maddox

Little Maddox is doing as well as can be expected. She is, for the most part, quite miserable though she does come out of this state for times each day. She slept so well in the hospital - morphine induced? - and, well, since coming home, she tosses and turns most of the night. And, on top of all of that, she will not eat. We offer her everything that we can think of, I even blended up a concoction for her, yet she closes her mouth ever so tightly and shakes her head "no" as fast as she can while her lip pokes out. On the flip side, when she sees food that is out for a meal, she immediately begins to point and let us know that she wants some. The pointing is most always followed up by screaming because she cannot have food, just liquids for now. This too shall pass:)

All of that said, she continues to bring smiles to our faces each day. We have reached that point where we don't remember life without her. She has adjusted so well to the craziness of our schedule. She has mastered the staircase, for the most part. She LOVES to dance. She must be missing a few bones - the way she bends and sits sometimes is just unbelievable! When we pray, she knows to fix her "pretty hands" but she always insists that we put ours on top of hers. Though MK continues to be the one most likely to receive a hit, Maddox is warming up to her and now will point to MK to come sit beside her or play with her - it is really cute. So, even though the surgery has been a bump in the road, our Maddox continues to thrive!

5-11-11 Afternoon Update

A quick update - last night went great, Maddox slept well and when she was awake, she was not in pain. She was most concerned with all of the connections, ie, the iv, the arm bands and, most importantly, the pulse ox on her toe. We both slept in her crib....when she would wake up, she would pat my back, I would say hello to her and she would hold that foot up and point to the big red toe that was shining so brightly from the monitor. It was an ET moment, if you can imagine. The dr. came in after finishing up with our friend's little girl - she had a lip repair this morning and is doing great. He stated that all looked good and ordered her off of the fluids. We will remain in the hospital until at least late this afternoon to see how well she tolerates her oral pain meds and to see if we can get her fluid intake to an acceptable amount. Meanwhile, Ryan is working, the big brothers and big sister are visiting grandparents and Maddox and I are touring the hospital grounds via wagon. Thank you all for your prayers!

Post Op

Maddox had her surgery this morning and all went very well. Right now she is resting, but starting to come out of her "fog". She has been able to drink some apple juice and Pediasure, which we are very happy about. We're pretty optimistic that we will be discharged sometime tomorrow afternoon, as long as she continues to drink. Our Doctor stated that it was a "very wide" cleft and that it was difficult to repair. It turns out that although her cleft lip was unilateral, her palate was bilateral.

Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers for Maddox! We appreciate each and every one.

Maddox's Surgery

Pray for our sweet little Maddox. Tomorrow she will have her first surgery to repair her cleft palate. The surgery is scheduled for 7:20am and will take a total of four hours. We have heavy hearts tonight. The surgery has to be done and is in her best interest. However, to go to sleep knowing that tomorrow your child will be in pain, well, it is just sad.

On This Mother's Day, I Am Thankful For.....

Ryan. Ryan made my dream of being a mother possible. Before marriage, we discussed children. His comment, one at a time. My comment, FOUR. When others were planning their careers, I knew what mine would be, a mother. That was my dream. Always. I was the child who faked sick (sorry mom) in 6th grade so I could draw my dream house plans complete with a bedroom for each child and then I got out the dependable Sears catalogue to shop for furniture to go in my dream home. I always planned for a family and Ryan has made that all possible.

My mother. For always being honest. My favorite line that I can still hear my mother saying is, "Are you going to wear that?" I would give her a snide look and she would shrug and say, "Well, alright." Though I do not always agree with her thoughts, she is the one who never fails to make me think. Thank you for helping me see the bigger picture when my own eyes are squinted.

My mother-in-law. For raising Ryan to be the man that he is. Ryan is patient. Ryan always jumps in without a complaint. Ryan loves his family. Ryan does dishes. Ryan goes with the flow most of the time - if he really has an opinion, he will express it and I have learned to listen up.

My boys. For making me a mother first. I felt you kick for the first time, I wiped your first tears and I celebrated your first smiles. I love that God gave me the privilege to parent the two of you. I love that I can look at each of you and see a piece of your father and myself present in your beings. I love that you are our biological children. Because of you, I know the sacrifice that your sisters' birth families made when they chose to surrender them to another's care.

My girls. For being the icing on the cake - you made our already happy family even happier. I will never forget the day that we met - I knew you at first sight - your eyes fixed on mine, filled with curiosity, mine filled with tears. I love that today, MK, age four, without any prompting, looked up at me and said, "Mommy, I am so glad for happy mother's day. Children without a mother or a father don't have a happy mother's day." Because of you, I know unconditional love has no boundaries.